Why I'll Never Be A Hand Model ...

Oh wow will you look at that it's late Wednesday night - er ... what happened to Tuesday? I could have sworn I posted an entry on Tuesday ..... ah, no ...wait ... that would be the Twitter effect - it makes you think you have been informative and erudite all day and then - hey presto - evaporates like the morning mist. Anyway how much deathless prose (or poetry) can one fit in 140 or so characters? (no that's not a challenge!!) - no wonder they invented l33t!!

I like this description of the Twitter phenomenon from TIME in partnership with CNN:

One early front runner for the title of the "YouTube of 2007" is a service called Twitter. Twitter enables you to broadcast to the world at large, via the Web or phone or instant message, tiny snippets of personal information: what you're doing, what you're about to do, what you just did, what your cat just did and so on. Twitter does the Internet equivalent of splitting the atom. It creates a unit of content even smaller and more trivial than the individual blog entry.

If you are at all interested in such things you can read the whole article at: Hyperconnected Time

So back to trivial blogging for real.

It has been a busy couple of days at the shop as we are getting ready for our Grand Open Weekend (and before you ask, no - we are not normally open weekends!) We are having 10% off all our stock for 2 days on the 12th and 13th May plus loads of half price bargains as well, we also have a 2 day sale happening in the Online Shop to coincide. It should be a busy couple of days - but the prep. is a nightmare!!! I have converted my studio into a demo area and will spend all day both days doing demonstrations of anything and everything I can think of using the crafting products we sell. Folks will be able to then take a place at one of the workstations and make something for themselves - in return they give a donation to our nominated charity.

Two more days to go and about five days worth of work to fill them with!!!

In the middle of all the setting up madness a new rep. turned up, unannounced, this afternoon. Now I fully recognise that these people have a job to do - but calling ahead to make an appointment would seem only courteous! After all your visit might not be convenient (which it wasn't!). Nevermind we try to be friendly and welcoming - but this woman was so hyper, manic even and spoke very fast at a decibel level about 10% above comfortable limits for normal indoor conversation. Added to that she seemed completely incapable of taking a hint - Well we're kind of busy right now ... no ... perhaps you could call back ... no ... well it's nice you dropped by but ... but ... er ... fine but ... *oh - just BUGGER OFF will you - my mind was screaming*. "And I plan to drop by to see you every 5 weeks ... ". Oh please God Noooooooooooo!!!

Then I had a Dentist appointment - the perfect end to a perfect day ....

So I bought a cake from the Bakery to cheer myself up. It is a Parsnip cake with Cream Cheese filling - think carrot cake but 200% more delicious. With a nod to Joe Mallozzi foodie Blogger extraordinaire - here is a picture of it:


And so ... finally ... why will I never be a hand model??

Well I thought that I would grow my nails a little and make them pretty for the coming 2 days of demos. Some hope - it never works out *sigh* see I work with my hands, I paint, I draw, I write, I spend untold hours tapping away on the computer keyboard, I do DIY, I sew, I cook ... sometimes!!

and my hands work for me and they look like they've had a hard day!!

So I'll never be a hand model ... and you know what? ... That suits me just fine!

AMx

Days Off Are Dangerous ...

Ooookaaay ... this what happens when you have free time & a sore throat and are consequently hepped up on cold remedies ... I feel no pain --- but I'm sure to hate myself in the morning ...

RAP BACK AT YA DH ...

Yo Slug White Nerd
we hear what you say.
You give us the word
and the freedom to play
on the Forum you created
to get your Movie rated
by all who drop by
to give it a try.
You Blog and we comment
and MySpace - we're on it!
And then there's Technorati
Hell yes, we'll join the party!
Visit Mars there on Dogster
what else are your fans 'fur'?
Oblivious to flames
and accused of playing games,
you write it,
we Digg it,
and watch your back
and take the flak
from the misanthropic minds
of the cynics on the Web.
And now there is Twitter
And what could be fitter,
for the biggest geek we know,
to keep us posted on the show
by using his cell
to save us from the hell
of not knowin'
what he's doin'
every minute of the day.
So ... hey ...
we're all on the hook,
an' that's clever in my book,
all waitin' to see
your illusive movie.
So quit messin' about
tell us when it's comin' out?
For Real...
Dude...?

by Amararti

... and may I offer this heartfelt apology to all who thought they knew me ....
;) you know the rest ...
AMx

Tao of Rodney ...

One careless moment ego steers me wrong.
My coding is unraveled and re-made.
But early fear of changes fly ere long
and role of super hero now is played.

Now say you I must lay my burden down
and cease to seek to find all answers sought,
use softer words than those for which I'm known,
I must relinquish self, become as naught.

Sorrow, and love for me from each good friend,
but wait, as now I float in darkness vast,
and seemingly my journey nears its end,
the light of realisation dawns at last.

All is not lost, myself I can regain.
Awake to find that "Yes, I'm me again!"

by Amararti

For all those of you who love Stargate Atlantis, Rodney McKay (as portrayed by David Hewlett) and this very special episode in particular.

No copyright infringement intended - just showing my appreciation ...
AMx

Auctions, Promises, Fairs and Apologies ...

Weekend at last ... well Sunday actually and Monday is a Bank Holiday here in the UK so ... yay! A day off.

Friday could have been a difficult day, as it would have been Mum's birthday, but I was so busy that I didn't have time to dwell on it much. I went straight from work to my daughter's school where we were holding an Auction of Promises as a fundraiser for refurbishing and equipping a new ICT suite at the school. So we can raise a whole new generation of little computer geeks - I'm all for it! There were some great promises on offer from 'Chocolate Brownies - once a month for a year' (bought by the Headmaster for the Staff) to 'A Week in an Apartment in Madrid' - and everything imaginable in between. I was in charge of taking credit card payments (as I am deemed the only one nerdy enough to know how the machine works - how right they are). During the evening we raised a staggering £15,000 - which was our target.

Oh and if there are any UK based readers of my ramblings - you can help out our fundraising efforts (at no cost to yourself) by simply doing your online shopping at several well-known retailers through our School Shop

Saturday was spent at the Craftsmans Market in Cirencester where I go twice a month to advertise myself and try to sell my paintings.



For over 25 years this Market has offered local artists and craftsmen a venue to sell their work - the standard is superb. We usually exhibit in the Corn Hall but, for good or ill this building along with the encompassing King's Head Hotel has been sold to developers who are .... er, developing it. At the moment this means that the Corn Hall is out of bounds and we have to exhibit in the stripped out King's Head Hotel - the interior of which resembles a cross between a bulding site and a non too salubrious squat. Oh well - the upside of this story is that I did sell 6 pictures ....

And finally ... those of you who were shocked and appalled not to say outraged and upset by David Hewlett's outrageous bout of 'rapping' will be glad to know that he has realised the error of his ways and has apologised ...



How does he keep a straight face? Well he is a brilliant actor - that's how - *smile*

Enjoy your weekend (what's left of it) ....
AMx

Stuck in a Dark, Dark, Room ...

Oh but it has been a tedious week. Thank goodness today is Friday although admittedly only 1:20 or so in the morning so still quite a bit of tediousness to get through before the weekend. I have been teaching or lecturing all week, one of my several jobs - (one day I really must decide what I want to do when I grow up) - a five day course in Geographic Information Systems (GIS) and Geospatial Analysis. OK for those of you who have dropped off to sleep - WAKE UP!!!!

Actually it is very interesting, and a very cool and sexy piece of software - but then I am a total geek and I also get paid loads to sit and play with said cool software on a computer all day and talk a lot at people who hang off my every word *smile*. So what is the tedious bit you ask - well several things really:

• Firstly - having to "dress-up" for the job - not me at all.


• Secondly - the God Awful Bloody Traffic which I have to endure, an hour into town in the rush hour and an hour back in the evening. Normally I only have to drive 15 minutes into the pretty countryside to drop my daughter off at school and then go to the Workshops where my Studio and Jane's Shop are.


• Thirdly - the classroom at the office has one wall composed of glass windows (the whole building is made of glass in fact) but it used to get so hot in there with the computer equipment and the sun beating in through the windows that they installed permanent blackout blinds and now the room has no natural light at all. By mid-way through the day I am suffering severe light deprivation. Plus the lighting gives me a headache.


• Fourth - the coffee comes out of a machine and is vile beyond belief, but I can't help myself.

On a lighter note the week was made much, much more bearable by the irrepressible Mr. David Hewlett and his outrageous rapping debut. This is what happens if you leave an actor waiting around a TV set for too long!



Talks fast doesn't he? Well if you didn't catch all of it and want to find out what he was on about you can read a transcript here Slug White Nerd Rap

One of the things he let slip (intentionally? - probably) was that his movie is coming out in the Fall. One can only assume he means the long awaited release of A Dog's Breakfast by MGM.

If so, Hurrah!!!

I have missed seeing it twice at the private screenings due to family circumstances.

My daughter is also excited (having seen the clips numerous times) and she it getting into training for a full on encounter with evil Patrick - as you can see!

What One Lemon Will Do ...

One of the interesting aspects of clearing out my Mum's house has been the discovery of many old documents, books, letters and the like, which are the accumulated family archive back to the 1600's.

One of the interesting things I came across was a little journal kept by a relative in 1810 in which are many useful (well no doubt they were in 1810) household tips.

I thought I would share this one with you:

What One Lemon Will Do

A piece of lemon upon a corn will relieve it in a day or two. It should be renewed each night and morning.

The free use of lemon juice and sugar will always relieve a cough.

A lemon eaten before breakfast every day for a week or two will entirely prevent the feeling of lassitude peculiar to the onset of Spring.

The juice of half a lemon squeezed into a teacup of strong black coffee without sugar will sometimes relieve a headache.

Perhaps its most valuable property is its absolute power of detecting any of the injurious and even dangerous ingredients entering into the composition of so many of the cosmetics and face powders in the market. Every lady should subject her toilet powder to the test. Place a teaspoonful of the suspected powder in a glass and add the juice of a lemon. If effervescence takes place, it is in infallible proof that the powder is dangerous, and its use should be avoided, as it will ultimately injure the skin and destroy the beauty of the complexion.

Wise words indeed - you have been warned ;) So it's a lemon for me for breakfast from now on - *yum*

Oh - and in case you are wondering, that's my daughter with a lemon that we grew ourselves and which ultimately ended up in my gin and tonic - by far the best use for a lemon that I can think of :)

AMx

Haiku-a-Thon - The Birthday Surprise

A little while ago (well it was on April 6th to be exact) I thought up a nice little idea to start a thread going on the dgeek forums over on the A Dog's Breakfast Movie website.

The pitch went something like this:

I've always been impressed by this poetic form (Haiku) and
its ability to, with few words, sum up the essence of
a thought, a feeling, a moment or in this case
a Stargate Atlantis episode.

So for those of you who don't know the form is three lines
first line 5 syllables, second line 7 syllables, third line 5 syllables
so 5 - 7 - 5 ... ok. An alternate shorter form is 3 - 5 - 3 ... either will do.

See if you can guess the episode ..... then have a go yourself

Me first:

at the end floating
in darkness inspiration
re-awakens self

Well the thread bumbled along as threads do, gathering a little momentum and more Haiku along the way. So I started to record the offerings in a list, thinking, oh ... this will make interesting reading if we ever complete the 60 verses necessary to cover the first three seasons of Atlantis sometime next Christmas .... Then .... three days ago the thing suddenly took off big time .... !!!

So followed 200 or so posts, three nights with almost no sleep (as my main playmates were situated on the other side of the Atlantic) ... and most importantly ALL 60 Haiku - and then some!!!

The main impetus for this? Well ... although I had thought it but not said anything, someone eventually did suggest that the completed Haiku project would make a nice birthday gift for one Mr. David Hewlett, Writer and Director of and Actor in A Dog's Breakfast and also (of course) the man behind the outrageously snarky (but exceedingly loveable) Dr. Rodney Meredith McKay in Stargate Atlantis.

Many, many, many thanks to Pixel, dpainter, ankhmutes, Icarus, Shawna, Becky S, Netty, and Scifi_lemon who share authorship of what follows with myself, Amararti. The Haiku have no titles but appear in season and episode order (be warned though - some episodes have more than one Haiku). There may be SPOILERS towards the end for those of you who have yet to see the back half of Season 3.

if you want to play guess the episode then you might prefer to take a look a the PDF version first - it is also prettier!

So here we have it: Atlantis from Rising to Flying - the story so far ...

Season 1

the challenge offered
to fly through unexplored skies
cannot be ignored

salvation this time
surface of empty ocean
breached by gleaming spires

something harmless, small,
to fuel a man's obsession...
and a new courage

to thread the needle
should have been routine now lives
hang in the balance

our new friends are close
new enemies seem closer
should we link the two

bird falls from the sky
treasure tempts to lead astray
never felt so old

folly of the people
weapon hidden inside them
their decision made

not all that they seem
facade covers so much more
hid 'neath secret doors

misty illusions
false reunions, where are we?
live to try again

evil incarnate here
with elemental force
threatens our city

a calm in the storm
slaughter fear uncertainty
city in peril

you cannot have her
not while I draw breath nor shall
engulfing ocean

truth in a mirror
my life restrains his desire
my death is my gift

a frightening death
slow, but sudden, right on time
cured for some too late

another eden
desire for companionship
leaves vulnerable

a perfect lady
mysterious, beautiful
much more than she seems

Sleeping Beauty wakes
deja vu heroism
doom but all safe now

trust misplaced
our dream of power
snatched away

loved ones far away
cannot know all we saw and
did before we died

fears, suspicions reign
nightmares frighten, stir self-doubt
blessing in disguise

not the first nor last
tragic noble sacrifice
made to buy us time

maybe I'm crazy
but someone has to do it
I guess it's goodbye

Season 2

thought I had lost him
sometimes, death comes way to close
for now, luck wins out

a killer lurking
one to fight with brains not brawn
a page from Sheppard's book

was lost but now found
stronger, faster, but yet less
now one lost again

a solo player
your thoughts are no counterpoint
inharmonious

trapped on an island
cruel and unusual
now the great escape

trust the sacrifice
at the altar of ego
not infallible

vulnerable child
but do not be deceived for
her bite is deadly

never felt like this
remarkable, yet scary
like a bad, bad dream

a call from my home
moving through the dark after
centuries asleep

Peter Pan bids us
battle pirates in the sky
and we must follow

timidity lost
raw power surges through me
enemies vanquished

eternal
lost in a bubble
where are you?

now he thinks I'm smart.
he's gonna get it from me!
damn Canadian...

a warning from home
explosive situation
force crossing a line

lost, alone, afraid
wisdom comes to comfort me
it's been a bad day

noble lords rule serfs
misery for those who toil
rebellion comes

rescue just in time
grant true lovers a farewell
headed for divorce

a treasure offered
a team missing or slaughtered
a power toppled

double helix morphs
evil stripped away it seems
too good to be true

a group of people
trapped at the end of a world
best way out is through

can we believe them?
new friends with everything we need
wolf in sheep's clothing

Season 3 (may be spoilers)

in desperate straits
cocoons hatch and migrate back
must follow the plan

you'd think I would learn
meddling with people this way--
people I should save...

see the world a new
should have listened from the start
so don't remind me

the home I once loved
ghosts memories violence
time to finish it

corrupted offspring
of an ancient race - cold fire
of hatred fuels them

harsh reality
life is a waking nightmare
yearning for return

I had never thought
to be saved by such a one.
Neither had my friends...

how can he not know?
it isn't freedom, it's fear.
not me, not at all

sister sees double
one of these is not quite right
but it's a nice change

how can we fight it
what we fear the most turns one
against the other

I had to leave to
realize that I belong
this is my true home

they are in our minds
so plant a seed - a falsehood
to deceive them all

Doctor Dolittle
questions rise in nightmares
helios the key

familiar faces
one conniving, one evil
get what they deserve

at the end floating
in darkness inspiration
re-awakens self

playing with their lives
McKay and Sheppard face off
it's SIMS Atlantis

actions have impact
make amends and discover
you are not a god

survival of sorts
hollow victory for one
now shepherd them home

just another day
mistakes, choices, the results
but why? why this day?

realization dawns
friendship lost forever, I
face the day alone

a very deep sleep
literally, not unlike
a watery grave

everyone's below...
so who's running the city?
Heightmeyer and Lorne

new friends go missing
through mazes to new terror
danger still to come

offense from afar
poking a sleeping dragon
our enemy's back

.... the story ... as they say ... continues .............